Monday, October 10, 2005

Wholly Non-Functional

Kid woke up at 12.20 a.m. this morning. Yes, one half hour after midnight. We had gotten to sleep at nine. She would not go back to sleep. Because it was dark. And, as I am certain you know, monsters live in the dark.

If we were willing to leave all the lights in the house on, and Billy Bragg playing full-volume on the CD player, and the TV on, she was willing to consider lying down in the bed. But those were her only terms, and she would not negotiate. We couldn't really get her to negotiate -- she was trembling with hysteria and terror. When I held her in my lap, I could feel her heart slamming in her chest.

I finally got up with her and let her lie in the white chair reading her Hank book while I worked on my SF novel, because why shouldn't someone in the house sleep?

She fell asleep again at five a.m. It's now 6.36. I have to leave for work in 20 minutes. I got, I think, about three and a half hours sleep last night. This is pretty much how our nights have been for the past month and a half.

If I don't get some sleep soon, I might die.

She's got her second therapist appointment this Tuesday. Christ, I hope something works soon.

I did get a lot of writing done, though. Hah. Silver lining.

1 comment:

CB said...

that poor baby is going to wear herself out just as fast as she's going to exhaust you.